Tag Archives: relationships

Five Lessons From 2011

This is me in Italy... May 2011

It’s been a while, but… I’m back!

The new year has arrived and, like many of you, I took a little time to reflect on the last year before the new one began. I am of the opinion that you can not stay the same year after year. There’s no way that you started 2011 in the exact same place that you started 2012. Things have changed, and experiences help you grow. I came up with this list of five lessons that I learned in 2011, that I hope will be the foundation to prepare me for even higher heights in 2012. Here they are: Continue reading Five Lessons From 2011

The Corny Conundrum

I’ve come to a conclusion. According to a few definitions, I like corny guys. Is this problematic? (Let it be known that I don’t really care how you answer that.) I’ve talked about it before, but, I am 100% down for a really good guy. Apparently though, according to the world around me…that’s not a good thing.

Dictionary.com defines corny as “trite, banal or mawkishly sentimental.” Urban Dictionary’s top definition of the same word reads “trying to be cool, but ultimately very uncool indeed, and often even extremely embarrassing” Both of those definitions are extremely subjective. It’s all about perception and situation. What’s “corny” to one, may not be “corny” to the next, right?

One of my favorite things to do is read comment sections on gossip blogs. Last week, as I was going through NecoleBitchie‘s site I came across a post which featured BET’s Terrence J. He’s on the cover of the latest issue of Bleu Magazine with the tag line “The Millionaire Gentleman”. I didn’t particularly like the picture they chose for the cover, but all in all, I thought it was a good look, and I even posted about it at The Uptown Lounge. As I read through the comments on Necole’s post, the words that I saw more than any others were “corny” and “lame”. Those words have been thrown around in reference to guys like Terrence J and Nick Cannon for years (Drake is the latest addition to the corny crew.) But why? Continue reading The Corny Conundrum

The Jordan Year

Michael Jordan is often regarded as the greatest basketball player to ever step foot on the court. Everything he accomplished in his career, from league leading stats and his signature style of play, to his footwear and trademark tongue wagging swagger, has been replicated by thousands of players with dreams of being the best…most of them, to no avail. Even the best current NBA player, Kobe Bryant (sorry LeBron fans) has not been able to escape being held up to the standard of Jordan. All of the championship rings, MVP awards, All-Star nominations, endorsement deals and multi-million dollar contracts, coupled with an innate knowledge and passion for the game made the name Jordan synonymous with one overarching theme: dominance.

Continue reading The Jordan Year

So I should give the swirl a whirl…?

Imagine this:

You’ve met someone extremely cool. I mean, like someone stop the world, everything around you disappears and no one’s in the room but you two kinda cool. You begin to converse and there are no hints of “stalker” or “crazy”…laughs are shared, flirting is at an all-time high, Frank Ocean begins to sing in your head and all of the sudden you’re beginning to think about forever. It might be premature, but, whatever. It’s a good feeling. You make plans to meet up again later in the week, exchange information (telephone numbers, BBM pins, twitter handles, facebook names, klout scores) and go your separate ways, dreaming about what may come from this enchanted encounter.

What happens next? Do you:

A) Go with your gut and meet up with the cool person, wind up falling in love and living happily ever after…


B) Consult a panel of strangers (comprised of so-called dating/marriage experts) only for them to tell you that you’ll never get married so you shouldn’t waste your time trying it?

Continue reading So I should give the swirl a whirl…?

“Situationships” Are The New Black…?

Your phone is buzzing. Your heart instantaneously flutters at the sight of the furiously blinking notification light. You’re reaching for it and simultaneously throwing up prayers to the Lord in hopes that He’ll bless you with some sort of communication from that one person you’ve been waiting to hear from for  the past four days. You eagerly open that inbox, only to be greeted by a mass promotional text for some event boasting the irresistible offer of 10 cent wings and $4 you-call-its, or maybe even worse, an email from Rue La La with just enough fashionable ammunition to take you into an online shopping binge (you know, the kind where you fill the virtual shopping cart but never check out…riiiight.) Continue reading “Situationships” Are The New Black…?

On Baby Mamas and Baby Daddies

Today as I was perusing my normal blogs for the latest news, I ran across a link to a blog written by one of my former favorite rappers, Bow Wow. A little back story: For months he has been adamantly denying rumors that he fathered a child with his ex-girlfriend, video model Miss Joie. In the wee hours of this morning, he posted a note on his blog, finally sharing with his fans that he does, in fact, have a beautiful little girl named Shai.

I was ready to applaud his decision to acknowledge his role as a parent, that is, until I got to a point in the note that gave me serious pause. Read it for yourself below: Continue reading On Baby Mamas and Baby Daddies

Does Social Media Cheapen Our Relationships?

Image representing Twitter as depicted in Crun...
Image via CrunchBase

Yes. It is true. Social media has become a part of our daily lives. Be it a source of information, an opportunity to promote your art, or to simply stay connected with family and friends that we don’t get to see in person on a daily basis. Twitter, Facebook, Foursquare and the like can be helpful, but have you taken into account the effect that they are having on your real life social interactions?

Elders say that our generation is more disconnected than ever. While on the surface, this might be unreasonable, if you really think about it, they are probably right. If you asked most people about their communication habits these days, you would probably find that they were more inclined to text, email, or contact people via social networks…rather than calling, or speaking in person. Think about it. There are plenty of things that you can say in a text message or tweet that you would never allow yourself to say out loud or to someone’s face. It’s this false sense of courage that has lead to a phenomenon we now refer to as cyberbullying, and a breakdown in communication across our culture as a whole. Continue reading Does Social Media Cheapen Our Relationships?

Stuck on Selfish Pt. 1 – Relationships vs Career

Walk with me into any pre-kindergarten classroom around the country. I guarantee you that there will be a group of children playing with a pile of blocks, maybe Lego’s. Do you remember when you were that age? Building towers was like an art form. All of your pieces had to be placed strategically to create whatever masterpiece you had in your mind that day, be it a castle or a bridge or just a really high tower. Do you remember what it felt like when some other child came by and tried to add to your work? You were probably already done building whatever you were building, but because you were so protective of your blocks, you told them that you didn’t need any other piece they had,  knowing good and well that you really could have used that connector. It didn’t matter that you may have needed the piece that they were offering, or that sharing that one piece could bridge the two creations to make something even greater. No, you just didn’t want them to touch your stuff, because its yours. There’s no rhyme or reason behind it, other than the fact that you’re a little kid, and you don’t know anything but what makes you happy. I’m sure you also remember what your mother had to say about this matter.

“Let someone help you sometimes…you can’t do it all by yourself baby”

But WHY? Continue reading Stuck on Selfish Pt. 1 – Relationships vs Career

Don’t Marry Him Girl!

Some couples should not get married.


Point blank.

That’s the conclusion that I’ve come to at this point. That’s almost a no-brainer right? Like if it doesn’t work…then it doesn’t work? Well we all know common sense is not really common, so some things just have to be said.

America has become enamored with reality television. Normally it’s the furthest thing from reality, complete with scripts, created drama. In short, it’s garbage we’ve all subjected ourselves to week in and week out for several years. This would be alright, if people didn’t really think it was real, and hadn’t begun to model their lives after the characters people play on these shows. Continue reading Don’t Marry Him Girl!

The Merwin Effect

With all of the hoopla surrounding the return of the hit series “The Game”… I’ve gotten a chance to sit back and think about just how much influence we have as consumers.

It’s rare, almost unheard of, for a show to be cancelled and then picked back up to produce new episodes on a new network. Fans petitioned and fought to bring their show back…and this time… they won.

What created this die-hard loyalty? The show’s writers and creators did an outstanding job of creating characters that were realistic and relatable. So relatable, in fact, that fans find themselves wishing they were in the character’s shoes. This fanaticism, while good for ratings could also be seen as a negative. I like to call this concept “The Merwin Effect” Continue reading The Merwin Effect